Hush Hush Sweet Charolotte
by Usagi's Oven
Summary: What if you were forced to keep secrets all your life, and one of them was almost too painful to keep? ... (rated PG13 for violence, language, and breif sexual content)
1. Another Secret to Keep [Prologue]

Prologue

Prologue

For my entire life I was forced to keep secrets, and none of them are anything I can be proud of … when my father catches me watching him fool his clients, another secret to keep, a lie to tell, or when mother is out in the boathouse with someone other than my father, another secret to keep, a lie to tell.

Father said once to me that sometimes a little white lie is good, and at the time I actually believed him. Now I know better. Now I am smarter. Never the less some secrets are just too hard to keep … and some secrets are impossible to keep.


	2. Lullaby

Lullaby

"Char-o-lett is Daddy's li-ttle girl!" Frank taunted childishly, though we were both in the seventh grade.

"And Fu-ra-ank Neal has his zip-per down!" I replied, then Frank reddened, and pulled his zipper up as all of his friends laughed hysterically. 

"If you weren't a girl I'd hit you ... " Frank said through his teeth

"Try it, find out what happens!" I threatened. Frank cowered, which just made his friends laugh even more.

I sat back in my seat tired of their stupid remarks; I was pretty, no doubt, with spiraling copper hair, highlighted with honey blonde, huge dark blue eyes, and ivory skin. I guess people just don't like me because I'm different, that threatens them. I do have one friend, Jeannie Halloway, who is ridiculed for her height, she looks more like an eight year old than a thirteen year old, and I am the only one who ever defends her.

Friends are never allowed at my house, and have never been before, because my mother thinks that children shouldn't have visitors, and my father just agrees with everything she says anyway, so it doesn't matter. 

My father is a well-known businessman, whom is respected and even honored, despite his foolery. I've caught him taking more money than he ought to from his clients, but every time he sees me later pulls me aside, and says that it wasn't bad what he was doing, they would never miss the money. Sometimes he would sing me an old lullaby that he had made for me when I was no older that two years old;

Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte

I'll Sing You a Lullaby

Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte

Please Don't Cry

Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte

I Will Never Tell You a Lie

Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte

'Till the Day I Shall Die...

I hadn't realized that I had been softly singing the words until I realized Jeannie was looking at me strangely.

"Charlotte, it's your stop."

"Oh ... sorry" I said groping for my books.

I then got off the bus, and sighed for I was returning to the house of lies once again...


	3. Baby

Baby

"Hello Charlotte!" my mother exclaimed

"What do you want mother?" I asked curtly, dreading her answer.

"Well I just want to tell you the good news, Charlotte."

"What?" I said, anticipating hearing of something stupid, and petty.

"I'm going to have another baby, sweetheart!"

All went black.

When I woke up, our housemaid, Ms. Loretta was hovering over me, with a painful looking grimace on her face. I watched her for a minute, before asking her what happened to me.

"You blacked out dear."

"What happened to my mother."

"She said that she was feeling a bit ill, and retreated to her room."

"My mother should be doing this." I said

"Oh, I'm sure it's just because she's feeling unwell, she would probably be taking care of you right now if she felt well. Besides, her condition makes it hard to do such things." Ms. Loretta replied cheerfully, though I saw the doubt in her eyes.

"Thanks Ms. Loretta, you can leave ... I'm feeling a lot better."

"You sure, dear?"

"Yes."

"Okay Charlotte, do as you wish."

When she left I got up to confront my mother in her bedroom, but was surprised to hear shouting in the room, I put my ear to the door to listen. It was my father.

"What do you mean your having a baby, we haven't been at it for at least a year!" my father stormed.

"Oh, George!" mother sobbed. "It wasn't my fault ... he--he forced himself on me, he just laid there on the chaise in the boathouse, and oh George, like you said, we haven't for so long, and it was so tempting!" 

At that my breath caught in my throat, another lie, a secret my mother had forced upon me, I remembered the scenario quite vividly.

I opened the boathouse door to see what noise I was hearing, and there in plain sight was my mother entwined in another man's arms. I had screamed, and slammed the door behind me. Later my mother had told me to keep it 'our little secret.'

"NO!" I screamed, covering my ears with my hands, and I ran halfway down to steps sobbing before I fell down the stairway, and all went numb.

My last memory before blacking out again was that familiar tune being sung by my father.

_Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte_

_I'll Sing You a Lullaby_

_Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte_

_Please Don't Cry_

_Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte_

_I'll Never Tell You a Lie_

_Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte_

_'Till the Day That I Die...___


	4. Not Sorry

Never Saying Sorry

Never Saying Sorry

"Please, please God--let her wake up," my father whispered. Faintly everything began to come back to me, the fall, the argument … and the baby. _Damn her for doing this, damn her _I thought bitterly. I tried to move my leg, but a terrible pain shot up my leg as soon as I attempted to do so, causing me to cry out. My father looked towards my face.

"Charlotte? …" I nodded faintly, to indicate I was listening. "Thank God!" he cried out.

"How long have I been unconscious?"

"Five hours."

"Five hours?"

"Yes, oh wait until your mother hears!"

"No … papa, I don't—_WAIT!_" I attempted, but it was no use, my mother was already heard whining down the hall.

I closed my eyes, when I opened them; my mother was standing in the doorway, with her hands on her hips.

"Charlotte, you know better than to listen in our conversations, I—"

"You lied to him mother."

"Charlotte, that is just between you and me … and anyway it's not a child's business to snoop into their parents' lives."

"I'm not a child anymore, mother, and this kind of thing … it's just not right."

"Your father lies."

"That's beside the point mother. What I'm trying to say is—"

"I AM YOUR MOTHER! CHARLOTTE, YOUR MOTHER, DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!"

Just then my father rushed in, and as if on cue, my mother burst into tears.

"What's going on here?" he said.

I turned my self in the other direction, while father comforted her, and lead her out of the room.

"Charlotte, you should apologize—"

"I'm never saying sorry, at least not until she does."

I turned around to go to sleep, with my father's shocked face in my mind, and the pain in my heart.

**To Be Continued!** I made the mistake of not saying that last time, now I am ~ _D. Melody O'C_


	5. At Midnight

Never Saying Sorry

At Midnight

I awoke to the sound of subdued voices, my parents I thought. I wanted to know what was going on so I shakily got up, and walked to the doorway and instead of seeing my parents talking I saw Mother flirting to a man. When I moved to see if I knew him, I stopped dead in my tracks.

The man my Mother made love to.

My heart raced, I tried to turn around, but my eyes couldn't get off them. I jumped; the clock bell rang, midnight.

All of the sudden the man started to kiss Mother on the neck, and then I just couldn't take it.

"No! She's pregnant!" I screamed.

My mother's frantic fiery eyes looked at me, with as much hatred as there should have been love for me in them.

The man laughed, and I realized he was drunk.

"Charlotte, you are supposed to be lying down." Mother said.

"Mother, you know how dangerous that is—"

"Shush! I don't want Chris, I mean Mr. Daniels hearing you." She smiled back at 'Mr. Daniels.'

"I will not 'shush!' What you were going to do is very dangerous for the baby!" I said deliberately raising my voice.

"What was I going to do? Nothing! Now go to bed!" Mother bellowed back, and added "Remember, Charlotte, you have to keep this between you and me!"

I walked down the hall, pretending I didn't hear. Not wanting to hear. Not caring. 

"You can kill the baby if you want! See if I care, Momma!" I yelled.

But the only reply was another laugh, a shriek, and the distinct sound of a door being slammed.

"I hope you do, I hope you go mad! I hope you die too! Hear that Momma? Hear me!" 

I slammed my own door afraid to think of what hateful crimes Mother was committing.

Afraid to think of what hateful crimes I was committing by keeping hers a secret. 

**_To be continued … by your Diva (literally!) Melody D. O'C (thinking of changing my name again!)_**


	6. Cruel, Cruel Fate

~1~

** **

Cruel, Cruel Fate 

I flipped absent-mindedly through the pages of a book, unable to avoid the sounds of them making love in the next room. I wanted to scream, but I already had. Screaming doesn't help. I hope my father walks in on them, I hope that he decided to cancel his business trip and come home, and then he will open the door and see. That way I wouldn't have to keep the secret, and I wouldn't have to tell him myself. My eyes slid down the pages, meaningless gossip about celebrities, how to do your hair, where to shop. I wished at that moment I could jump into that magazine, and stay there forever. The moaning got louder, and I lay down, and shoved a pillow over my head to drown out the noise. But nothing worked, I could still hear them. Then, abruptly it stopped. I sighed a long sigh of relief, and stared at the ceiling. 

I felt hollow, empty as if mother had sucked the life out of me as you would suck the yolk out of an egg you wanted to preserve. Now the house was completely silent except for the distant ticking of a clock in the hall. Tick, tick, tick, tick … then I heard the sound of a door slowly opening, and I guessed that the man was finally gone.

I went into my mother's room to speak with her only to find her passed out in her bed, I turned off her light and left … hoping that tomorrow she would feel remorse for her actions. Hoping tomorrow I would feel remorse for deciding to keep this a secret. I walked back to my room and sat on the edge of my bed thinking about the baby developing in my mother … what would he or she be like? Not anything like mother I hoped. I got up again and went in to the kitchen to fix a late night snack I realized that the clock said two fourteen, so I got a banana and ate it quickly. Then I went to bed.

When I woke up (late) I saw that, as expected mother was hung over. She drank her coffee in a daze and we didn't speak. She looked as if she wanted to, though her eyes told me exactly what she was thinking; do not tell your father about this. Not sorry, no remorse … only selfishness. God I hope never to be like her, but then again maybe this cruel, cruel fate that makes the world as it is will make it impossible for me to be any other way. I only have one thing to say; I most certainly hope not.

** **


	7. Scared

Chapter 7-Scared

Chapter 7-Scared

** **

It gives me a sickening feeling to have no way out I thought walking up to the attic, it was time that I went up again. I walked cautiously up the stairwell, self-conciously tugging my nightgown down even though no one was there to see.

I came face to face with the door of the attic, I tried to open it it, it was either jammed or locked, so I kicked it to check, it swung open, only jammed, I straightened up and gasped with horror for lying on the floor were all the things I had left there last time I had come up, but they were destroyed, curly top dolls were lying on the ground caked with something brown and a horrible smell was coming from the chest, mouse holes were abundant around the attic room and a single kitchen knife sat caked with what I was afraid was dried blood, I inched closer and closer to the chest, something told me not to, lock the door and leave, just leave but curiosity was building up, I got to my knees by the chest, the smell was almost unbearable now, and I opened the clasp.

I was too afraid to scream, too afraid to run, too afraid, because there lying in the open trunk was a dead body, Momma's lover "No …" I whispered "No." 

A voice from behind me interrupted "yes," I turned and there was my father, I opened my mouth to scream yet nothing came out.

"No use screaming, sweet Charlotte, if you do, you'll be next," I looked about frantically, the knife was clear across the room, I couldn't believe Daddy was doing this.

"No, papa, please …" I croaked, I might be all over in a few seconds.

"Move, sweetheart!"

~~~~~TO BE CONTIUED …. MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! I AM EVIL FOR TORCHURING YA LIKE THIS HUH?


	8. The Secret That Could Kill

Chapter 7-Scared

Chapter 8-A Secret That Could Kill Me

** **

Papa was leading me towards the door with a gun to my back, "Keep this our little secret, okay Charlotte?" he whispered then began to madly sing the lullaby. The barrel of the gun was loosening from my back, and I knew not to scream even then, a large lump was growing in my throat, I couldn't move.

"Papa, please …" I croaked, it was unreal, I was expecting to wake up any minute, he kept singing, stoking my back, little by little the gun was leaving my back. I didn't wake up.

I tried hard to not think of what was sitting less than ten feet away from me, but it's hard not to, I whimpered, and the gun was again pressed hard to my back.

Papa let go of me "Remember, sweet Charlotte, our little secret, or I will kill you, be sure of that." 

With that I ran, down the stairs, out the door, away … Papa's madness leaking into me, I tripped and skinned my knee, I ran farther, and to the road, and sat on a rock, further soiling my night dress with mud. I suppose I must have looked queer, in my nightdress crying on the side of a road, many disapproving faces passed by, and I sat there wondering whether I should take my life. It was so friendly, that thought, I wouldn't have to deal with the secrets. Even hell would be better than our house.

The sharp winter wind went under my wool nightdress and chilled me past my bones, forcing me to get up, and walk back on my bloodied feet to the house, but once I arrived, I decided to return to the guest cottage instead, inside the cottage it was nearly as cold as inside, so I went back out to pick up some sticks and lit a fire in the long unused stove, then curled onto the window-seat and watched the house until I got hungry. I checked the cupboard in the minute-size kitchen, the only thing was canned peaches and chili, and some sleeping pills.

I opened the canned peaches and ate them straight out, I crushed the whole bottle of pills into the peaches, the. Trying to avoid thoughts of the attic, maybe I would die here, I thought, then I drifted into reverie, a trance.

I was five years old again running into papa's arms, watching mother dress up for a party. The world made sence again.

I was drifting out of my body, the peaches fell to the rug, I didn't care. I was floating, sleep was covering me like a warm bath. The world was slow motion I was running, my mother was there, I was gone.

A Technicolor world was behind my eyes, I opened them, the door was opening, my mother ran to me. Disembodied screams were floating in my ears. I was care-free. I was in an ambulence … doctors. It's a dream. Dreaming.

Later I found I had had an overdose, I lived. How unlucky am I? 

My father came to the hospital, or at least that was what I was told, he came and sang, I heard it in my dreams.

"_Hush Hush Sweet Charlotte_

_I'll sing you a lullaby_

_"Hush Hush Sweet Charlotte_

_Please Don't Cry_

_"Hush Hush Sweet Charlotte_

_Till the Day that I die_

_"Hush Hush Sweet Charlotte_

_I'll never tell you a lie."_

I had a dream, that night, or day, that forever changed my universe. I had a day that forever changed my universe.

Hopefully it would end.

Hopefully it would stop.

Now I should hush, like the song said.

Maybe the lies and secrets would end.

But I know it never will.

And the song will never end.

Now all I hear is the beat of my heart …

To Be Continued …


	9. Too Late [Epilouge]

Epilouge

Epilouge

"Today is a very dark day on earth, for Charlotte Sommers has died, loved and cherished by many this death is a tragedy mourned by all …" the priest said standing above the coffin. Charlotte's beautiful face was paled from her long fight for life.

"After fighting for three months in a coma, her soul is finally put to rest …"

Tears fell upon her fresh grave, mixed with raindrops … Emma Sommers, Charlotte's mother was finally feeling remorse for her deeds. 

"If only you knew …" Emma whispered touching the grave stone that was her daughters. "If only you knew …"

Look for my up and coming story Roses on the River, Belle, Emma's daughter's story of living in the same household.


End file.
